TIT-FOR-TAT
So! I‘ve been asked to write a blog! Apparently, this will get me more website followers – who knew??
Ok, so now I have to write. I don’t write. Not because I can’t, but because it’s just not me. I’m a listener, not a talker. Others may argue that point – oh and when a drink has been had, apparently I don’t keep quiet! (Dutch courage?)
2023 has been a year of firsts for me. I’m on my 8th book (I actually enjoy reading) and now I’m starting my blog! I have no idea how often this will be done or even if I will enjoy it. But, if you enjoy the blog, provide feedback, follow me, and send other followers my way, then I’ll write for you! I may even post the odd article I think you’ll enjoy! So this is an experiment. Kinda like a first date getting to know the person.
I assume you’d like to know a little about me? Oh, Lord! The perception I have of myself seems to be very different from the perception others have of me! I sometimes feel like there are numerous personas that form part of who I am: the one I am around family vs. the one I am around friends; the one I am at work vs. the one on a weekend. Hmmmmm this really gets me thinking!
So, my name is Marc. I am 31, born and bred in Johannesburg to a Jewish family. I went to a Jewish day school. I literally had 10 parents: a mother, a biological father, a step-father, three sets of grandparents, and one adoring great-grandmother. No wonder I’m multifaceted! Everyone thought I was a girl, and in my mom’s true style, my first item of clothing was white. This meant that nobody actually knew what I was until my mother told them: “It’s a boy!” Bear in mind my step-father and his parents came into the picture when I was five. More on those life details later.
And so my life started. I was different. I was Ma-vas, attached to my mom’s hip like no other. School was hideous (nursery school). I did not have many friends and life was spent in my own world. Yes, I was a daydreamer, but that was my safe space!
My first real conscious memories are from when I moved into my maternal grandparents’ home during my parent’s divorce. That’s the first home I remember – albeit my first real home was a flat in Illovo with my mom and dad.
No one understood me and everyone looked at me funny. Was I dressed funny? Did I look weird? What did my mother do to me!? People would often stop my mom and gush: OMG you have a beautiful daughter!” She’d first thank them, and then correct them! My clothes were high-end, and I was often dressed in white even at age four, in fact, I still love dressing in white but I can’t because I’d literally look like the Michelin man!!!!
Play dates were forced and I’d always make my mom come with me. I hated going to friends’ houses and preferred they come to mine. No one really chatted to me at school (pre-primary). I always found myself sitting at a tree closer to the adult’s table (where the teachers sat on break duty) waiting for time to tick by so I could go home!
Home was my safety. There was always someone at home. My gran taught piano so there was always somebody in the lounge with her and the house was filled with beautiful music – all day and into the night!
This is where my imaginary, fantasy world started. This is where I dressed up and where I had imaginary friends (names were given and apparently these people once were living). This is where I was safe. Alone at home in my head!
Shop-shop, dress-up, dress-up! Yes in my gran’s or mom’s clothes – more on that later. Everything was timed. I knew when people would be getting home and I knew what would happen – so I knew when I needed to step out of Marc’s world! Buttt what I didn’t know is that EVERYONE knew!!
After school I tutored, au paired, watered, and did a travel course. I worked in travel for a large part of my 20s. Whilst working I decided to tap into my spiritual world and develop the skills I had. I knew I had skills, I just didn’t know what they were. As it turns out, I’m a psychic medium.
Ok, so I am Jewish, gay, fat AND a psychic medium! I mean howwww much more different can one person be? I am seriously not cut out for this!! To this day I prefer to be alone! Yes, I have friends and have had friends throughout my life, but not a lot. Never the popular child and always a loner. Literally Elphie from Wicked!
My family was my everything and adults were my friends. I had more in common with them. I could talk to them, connect with them and they connected with me. My friends were my mothers’ and grandparents’ friends. Yes, I was the precocious child always at the adult table having adult conversations, but I knew my place and when I was tired I’d crawl under the table and go to sleep. Adults were my safe world, literally from age 0.
There have been so many twists and twirls in my life and I’m sure you have many questions! I know if I was you the reader I’d already have a million and one questions! I’m such a voyeur it’s baddddd! However, my voyeurism isn’t from a kochleffel*point of view, but from a curiosity point of view. I’ve always been curious and people have judged me for it, and I totally understand why. But I’m curious and I just want to learn.
So, I encourage you to ask questions and to be a kochleffell* in my life! Get me to write anything you feel will fulfill your soul’s curiosity. Your questions will prevent me from dumping down all my life stories and looking like a doos! This is my vulnerable place where other curious voyeurs can come and grow together and build a community!
Just writing this down has been very cathartic. Even if it is only read by the editor and the person that publishes it on my website (the two of you know who you are!) all I can say is thank you for reading.
I already have a few ideas for new blog posts. All my topics will be related to my life experiences:
- Weddings
- Death
- Divorce
- Family dynamics
- Siblings
- Finance – had it and lost it
- My work psychic medium – this will be featured in most of my blogs as it’s who I am.`
These are just ideas I have. Suggestions of what you’d like to know about will be welcomed! Follow me and drive traffic to my website and I will give you more of what you want! ????????
Thanks in advance for being my community and my now “real” virtual world
Blissful wishes
*Yiddish word and the literal meaning is a cooking spoon. When spoken in Yiddish is referred to a person that likes to know a lot.
(Yiddish dictionary to grow out of these blog posts!)
